Facebook, blogger, instagram...all these things are great. I love keeping in touch with people that I normally wouldn't and it is so much fun to see pictures. I check instagram often just to see what the world is doing. Sometimes it's comforting for some odd reason.
That being said, it can be bad. Very bad.
Almost immediately after birthing my children the Mommy guilt set in and I felt like I was are already failing even though I was trying my damnedest to be the best in the whole world.
Along with the dreaded, never ending guilt, you start comparing. And that my friends is dangerous. You start looking at other kids, other Moms, other lives and try to keep up. The guilt gets worse and pretty soon you are feeling awful about yourself.
I have gotten a lot better about not comparing, however I still feel judged so I'm working through that.
If you don't know what I'm talking about then good for you (also, you probably don't have facebook or instagram). So let me paint a little picture.
Let me narrate these pictures with the facebook facade (FF) first, then the actual.
FF: Today was a rainy day so we stayed inside the house looking super cute in our name brand lounge clothes that fit perfectly. Despite my lack of makeup I looked stunningly beautiful and my hair was flawless even though it was just in a ponytail. Brian was tired from his hike so I lovingly put him down for a nap then the girls and I made muffins together, 6 chocolate chip and 6 mixed berry, perfect.
Actual: My lounge clothes don't fit perfectly, that's why they are comfortable. I looked scary with no makeup and crazy ugly hair. Brian had been gone for 3 days and I was exhausted, but he was grumpy and wanted a nap. I annoyingly took the girls downstairs. We made muffins and they loved stirring them, we put them in the oven to wait and they eventually started fighting so much I put them in their rooms for 5 minutes to cool down.
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| Super delicious and scrumptious |
FF: While we waited for the perfect muffins to cool down so we didn't burn our adorable little tongues, we smelled the delicious scent of our candle and were mesmerized by the gorgeous glow.
Actual: I googled some rainy day activities, not once did we admire the candle warmer (although I did appreciate the smell)
FF:Once our muffins were cool enough to eat, we sat at the princess table together and had a perfect little tea party. We clinked our glasses to cheers our fun rainy day tea party and devoured our flawless muffins.
Actual: Reese spilled her water, I stood at the counter and ate my muffin
FF: After that I set up a fun game for my kids that also taught fine motor skills, increased their creativity, and secured the bond in our relationship. I'm sure you have all done this game because every Mother has, at least all the good ones, hahahaha. Marshmallows and toothpicks!
Actual: I've never done this game before
Actual: I did all the building
Actual: They ate all the marshmallows
Actual: That was a lot of work and when Brian woke up I took a nap.
Now don't get me wrong, I don't want to hear about all the negative in peoples lives, which is why my blogs are normally somewhat happy and positive. But I want to make sure there is some real in here because I am not perfect. I love my kids, we play, I teach them stuff, I clean, I love my husband, but we also have lazy days where there is more tv going on than normal. That's okay, our girls get cuddles and hugs every single day without fail and are told at least 53 times that they are loved. Which is a victory and I'll take it.
So Moms, let's support each other and not judge. I'm sending my love out to those Moms who are having a rough day, I've been there, don't feel bad or guilty about extra tv...or extra wine (for you, preferably not the kids!) :)
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