The Easy and the Hard

A fellow blogger had a great post yesterday where she listed what is easier than she thought after her little girl arrived, and what is harder. So I am going to copy her.

EASIER than I thought it would be:

• Labor and delivery. It went so much faster than I thought it was going to and I was impressed that I held it together and dealt with the contractions so well. Fortunately the epidural helped me during delivery as I didn't feel anything. Epidurals rock.
• Recovery. I was doing laundry and cleaning within a couple days of having Bria, although I think I should have slept more, but still, I was surprised that I physically felt capable.
• Breastfeeding. I don't want to offend anyone so when I say breastfeeding was easier than I thought I know it's completely different for others and I would never judge someone for not breastfeeding. I was really scared that it was going to be difficult and Bria wouldn't latch or she wouldn't suck or my supply wouldn't come in, on and on. So I was so happy when it went well from the beginning. Originally I was thinking I would nurse for 9 months, but now I'm thinking 12 months.
  
• Laughing with Brian. I was afraid our relationship would change so drastically that we'd forget how to be ourselves and laugh together, but we used humor more so in those first few weeks than anything. I am so grateful to have him.
• Taking showers everyday. That is the one thing that makes me feel like I accomplished something so I make sure and do it everyday, I was surprised that I am able to do this, lol.
• Taking her on errands. She really likes the stores which is awesome.
• Losing weight. I know nursing is the reason for this because normally I can't lose weight easily.
  

HARDER than I thought:

• Dealing with the lack of sleep. This pertains to the first couple weeks. I really thought that I could do well without sleep, and I can....for a day or 2. But after a couple days, then a week, then 2 weeks, I felt like a zombie and I wanted to sleep so bad.
• Not having a routine. It seems we have a routine for a week or 2 and then it changes, I thought babies napped at the same time everyday, ate at the same time everyday, pooped at the same time everyday. Nope, not the case, at least for use anyway.
• The amount of spit up. I really had no idea I would have a hard time with this, but the amount of harfing that Bria does is incredible, I have no idea how this child has gained weight. I swear all the milk and solid food she eats ends up on me, her, burp rags, bibs, floors, blankets, couches, MJ, you name it. She throws up all day long.
  
• MJ. I thought MJ would love Bria, but it's taken awhile just to get to where MJ will be around Bria. I also can tell I'm not half as concerned about MJ now that Bria is here.
  
• Not knowing what she needs/wants. I seriously thought I would be able to tell what she wanted, whether it was sleep or food or whatever. I still feel lost and am not sure what she wants, plus I hate decisions so a lot of times I'll ask Bria, "What should I do?" I guess I thought with time I'd know, but so far I still feel lost.
• Germs. I've always been kind of chill about germs, now I get freaked out and don't want her to touch anything that could possibly have 1 germ on it.
• Getting the motivation to clean the house. When she takes a nap I want to be on the computer and watch tv, I feel so lazy.
  
• Not being able to leave her. I seriously thought I would be able to leave her with someone and go do this and that, but I have the HARDEST time doing this. In fact, Brian and I had a big conversation about it last night and it involved lots of tears by me. I realized I have this huge weight on my shoulders because I feel the stress of being a mom 24/7 and the stress of not being able to get away from the stress. Going out on a date night with Brian to relax and have fun would make me more stressed out because I would be wondering how Bria was doing. I honestly had no idea I would feel like this and it's made things really tough. I am attempting to take baby steps and solve this problem. Honestly, this is by far the hardest thing and it's on my mind all day and night. I already have a hard time dealing with anxiety and this has definitely tripled now that I've become a mom. I'm trying to deal with it as best I can, talking to Brian helped and it felt good to get it out.
  

No matter how hard things get, not a day goes by where I don't think to myself, "I am so incredibly blessed." I thank God for our little girl and feel honored to be her momma. She keeps us laughing and smiling each and every day.

I know she makes more than just her Dad and I happy, our families can't get enough of her and she is in high demand. I love seeing our families swoon over her, it makes me happy and proud all at the same time.

Heather, this is one of the outfits you got her, doesn't she look adorable?

I added the sneakers and she couldn't keep her eyes of them and kept playing with the laces.

My aunt Loann and uncle Ron got Bria the cutest Blazer outfit. Since Brian and I were on the Trail Blazer stunt team it's only fitting that Bria sport some Blazer gear, and it's the cutest gear ever.

Isn't that the cutest bum?